New Day, New Life

I know it’s corny to talk about a new day, a new life or one day at a time, but the reason it sounds so over-used is because it’s a real possibility. Change can happen. We all make mistakes. Some of us get lost in life. We aren’t born with a how-to-live-well manual. Our parents and teachers try their best, but, still, life can become complicated, painful and confusing. If someone develops a problem with alcohol or some other drug, it can become even more complicated.

When we’re lost, and life becomes painful, it’s hard to see outside our pain and confusion. Hopefully, there comes a point for someone lost and in pain at which they ask for help. Asking for help is difficult for men and women. You often hear how men are prideful and don’t easily ask for help, but it’s also hard for many women. It’s hard to be vulnerable, to open yourself up to disappointment. It takes courage to ask for help. It also requires a little research.

It’s true that a person can become disappointed when they ask for help. There’s never a guarantee that you will find someone who can or will help. It pays to search for the right form of help. Just because someone says they want to help, doesn’t mean they know what to do or say. Sometimes, if you just need someone to listen, then a good friend in invaluable, but when it’s complicated, like addiction or mental health, then it takes a different, more specialized kind of help. If you have serious car trouble, you’re not likely to find much help with a carpenter, or even with someone who has tinkered a little on cars from time to time.

Once a person gathers the courage to ask for help, it’s smart to research, to interview various professionals who specialize in the particular problem you’re experiencing. If it’s addiction, then look for professional services that specialize in addiction. Just because someone is a social worker, a licensed counselor or a psychologist doesn’t mean they possess specialized knowledge or skills related to addiction. Professional pride might cause them to think they can handle addiction, but it’s usually based on a relatively few college hours that dealt with addiction. Unfortunately, addiction is not comprehensively taught in psychology oriented college study or medical school, even though doctors, social workers, nurses, counselors and psychologists are faced with people all the time who suffer from addiction. Addiction can look like many things, and it creates many symptoms that look like mental health/emotional or health problems. Addiction is a problem within itself, and it has to be diagnosed and treated as a progressive and fatal brain disease — a fundamental condition — before the mental health/emotional, behavioral or health symptoms will improve.

Treating the fundamental condition of addiction requires specialized treatment that deals with the fundamental problem, not just talking therapy or medicine. Make sure you do your homework before asking for help. A new day that starts a new life one day at a time is possible, but you have to have a smart plan that’s carried out diligently over a long time. It’s not easy, but it’s worth the effort, if you want to live well and create the best opportunities to prosper and pursue happiness.