Addiction and Denial

Here is an excerpt from PsychCentral:

Accepting reality enables us to live in reality.

What does this mean? When life pleases us and flows in accordance with our needs and desires, we don’t think about acceptance. But when our will is frustrated or we’re hurt in some way, our displeasure causes us to react, ranging from anger to withdrawal.

We might deny or distort what’s happening to lessen our pain. We might blame others or ourselves or we try to change things to our liking and needs.

Denial

Although in some circumstances denial is a useful coping mechanism, it doesn’t help us solve problems. Nor does blame, anger, or withdrawal.

Denial is more common than we may realize. Everyone alters reality somewhat by perceiving events in accordance with our personal biases. Yet, sometimes we unconsciously use the defense of denial to make reality more palatable. Examples are:

• Minimizing

• Rationalizing

• Forgetting

• Self-deception

• Repression

Denial is a big part of addiction, and it frustrates those close to the addicted person. The significant other can see clearly that the problem is alcohol or other drugs, yet the person afflicted denies reality. In treatment we try to move past this denial so that the person accepts reality and begins recovery. In cases of serious addiction and denial that’s almost pathological, a formal intervention might be necessary using leverage to get the person to seek treatment. I’ve seen over and over people forced into treatment through leverage from the family, job or judge accept their addiction problem and start the recovery process.

The old adage that a person has to want to recover before they can recover is not entirely true. Many people who come into treatment have no desire to stop using alcohol or other drugs — they just want to get people off their backs. But once confronted with reality, the person begins to let go of the insane denial and accept their condition. Most times, there’s a grief process giving up alcohol or other drugs, like losing a loved one, or finally accepting a marriage isn’t working. It can be difficult to give up something your mind has told you, erroneously, for years is necessary for your survival.